So you’re out of treatment, and you’re ready to take on the world! That Pink Cloud feeling is in full effect and you’re ready to dive into the world of recovery. And why not? You’ve spent time at a well-respected facility with highly capable staff members who’ve guided you on to a path of spiritual awakening. And a key component of being on that path is having a solid support group around you for this journey, even after treatment. So what does this support group look like? I prefer to call it “your personal tribe”… those people that you vibe with… the people that seem to be as fired-up about following the path to recovery as you are. And most importantly, the people that are able to speak up (hopefully in a compassionate tone) when you are “screwing up” or out of alignment with your higher power.
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Where To Find Personal Support After Recovery
Where do these people come from? In my experience: people I continue to run into over and over again at meetings (almost like the universe plans for me to keep bumping into them) is a great start! Or maybe a housemate from your sober living… or one of your sponsor’s sponsees that you’ve been introduced to. Your higher power will put them in your vicinity, it’s up to YOU to take the action.
That’s one of the many beautiful aspects of the recovery community… you meet a lot of people that are on a similar path as you. Which is a good thing… because we need them! One school of thought says “get as many phone numbers from as many people as you can.” While I’m not opposed to this, in my own journey this just caused me to have a ton of phone numbers that I never called. So I began to slow down and get more focused, only exchanging numbers with people that I truly intended to reach out to.
How To Find Personal Support After Recovery
Most people in recovery are used to exchanging numbers, so while it may seem awkward at first, you’ll probably be surprised at how readily people are willing to trade their contact info with you. After the second or third time, you’ll realize that it’s quite the norm in our community. People come to expect it.
Don’t overthink it… just do it. For example, when someone at a meeting shares something that resonates with you, talk to them afterward about what they shared and how you related. Then.. here’s the somewhat uncomfortable part… ASK FOR THEIR NUMBER. Here’s some sample dialogue that you can make into your own…
“Brother, this is a really good meeting. Let me get your number in case you ever need me to give you a ride or vice versa.”
“Hey, if I need to “10 Step” with someone during the day while I’m having a hard time at work, can I get your number so I can call you?”
Or even “Man, you seem like someone I should stay in contact with so we can help each other stay sober… let me get your number.”
Read More: The Importance Of Human Connection
How many people should be in your personal Tribe? Obviously, it’s going to be a different number for each person, but as an overall figure, I would shoot for between 3-5… and better to OVERSHOOT that number and be left with only a few than to have it dwindle to nothing (and as you will soon find out if you haven’t already, people can drop fast if they’re not staying connected).
How Important Is Personal Support?
How important is a personal tribe? I would say it is up there with getting a sponsor. It may not happen overnight or be as easy as getting a sponsor, but it has been vital in my recovery. Make no mistake, it does take EFFORT on your part and you have to be willing to get out of your comfort zone. But put away the excuses, humble yourself, and REACH OUT to build your recovery network. The end result will be well worth the energy spent.
Not everyone knows how to initiate the process of finding like-minded peers in their area, and that’s okay. To learn more about options you, your patient, or a loved one can pursue in order to not only start but also stay connected with one’s tribe.